Isolation as a relationship killer: the Corona-crisis in many pairs for?
More time for the family, for the Partner, get out of the professional rat race – many are likely to have the desired. Anyway, in front of the Corona to a standstill.
But let’s be honest: While the Corona-restrictions, to spend the whole day with your Partner, surrounded by whiny children who need help with Homeschooling (home schooling), your work in the home office – that was more than some wanted. Or could handle.
Corona-crisis as the ultimate stress test?
The pandemic of partnerships to the ultimate stress test, we are faced with a divorce wave? In a year, namely after the separation of the year, it should be clear whether or not that’s true.
According to a survey, the number could rise noticeably.
Since mid-March, the Berlin-based family-rights activist Alicia von Rosenberg registered divorces “so many requests” to.
And while in the past the requirements have been met and the mandatory separation had been passed the year, this time everything is different: “The people had just separated and not informed of what requirements must be fulfilled.”
Maren Otto, Couple therapist in Hanover, spoke of the “large crowd”, the requests rose by about a quarter, of all things, in time, as therapists because of the pandemic were not allowed to work and by phone advised.
Usually there is a “summer hole”, a time in which people prefer to go on vacation and not in the mood for Some Coaching would be: “The this time was completely different.”
Rainer Bugdahn from the main office for counseling of the Evangelical-Lutheran Church of Hanover sees two clear trends: Corona-Lockdown would have had more time to talk to each other – therefore, there is no acute need for advice.
In the other hand, the Couple conflict intensified, however. The reason: they had to spend more time together, while communication skills and will be low.
“Which tendency is the stronger, I can’t designate, since we still have no reliable Figures are available,” he said.
But, obviously, the so-called Lockdown had led to the fact that in families a total of more speaking – a lot of couples would be needed, therefore less advice.
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Decision on separation
In others, however, the needs grew: A Few have explained, the Lockdown was for the first time, have been for years, a Chance to take care of everything – including legal issues like a divorce, said of Rosenberg.
“For some, this is the hurdle, a divorce, tackle: Now on time.” Others have noted that it “had to have popped” – the prescribed withdrawal in the own four walls has brought the decision: I have to separate myself.
May not be the case: A survey by the opinion research Institute Civey, according to the number of divorces in Germany will increase due to the Corona restrictions expected to be a factor of Five.
Thus, 2.2 percent of the 2,500 respondents said to have between the end of March and the end of may, decided to get a divorce. In a Two-month period in 2018, it had been only 0.42 percent of all Married.
In the courts, this is not reflected yet. Because if it should come to separations in the Corona of the time, would be submitted to the divorce until next spring, because the separation year has to be awaited, said a spokesman of the local court of Hannover.
An Outlook on what might come, but press reports on the situation in China: There is to have led for many couples, the first way to freedom after the quarantine to the divorce lawyer.
Why is this so? Maren Otto said, especially couples with children are in “crisis-ridden Situation”: children in the Homeschooling mother and father in a home office. And when arrangements did not work, lead to great disappointments.
Many men would have dragged the Argument to work full-time, and the women left with the children and of their own work alone.
The crisis has reinforced the traditional distribution of roles, criticized them. Bugdahn said, the need for family counseling for parent-child-conflicts – keyword “Homeschooling” – had increased “noticeably”. Parents are sometimes overwhelmed and “at her wit’s end”.
Lockdown as an “accelerant”
And the Lockdown had “as a brand accelerator” cast, said Otto. Because some felt at home, locked up, and where it is in the partnership anyway kriselte, cooked the confrontation high.
The Problem: “Couple therapy by phone is very difficult,” said the therapist. “It’s about trust.” For many older couples, the situation was serious, if you come to the therapist: “The therapy is the last attempt.”
But it is perhaps not as bad as feared: A client I once said, apart from the final separation, of Rosenberg.
The reason is that In the time of the lock downs, the contact to her husband was much better. Because the Corona had a Good crisis, quite unexpectedly, even to her.
Deutsche Presse-Agentur (dpa)
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